Loving Your Inner Child: The First Step to True Healing

Imagine you're on a plane, and the flight attendant reminds you: "Put on your own oxygen mask before helping others." It’s a simple instruction, yet so many of us ignore it in our own lives. We push through pain, bury our emotions, and focus on taking care of others before tending to ourselves. But healing doesn’t work that way. To show up fully in the world, we have to embrace every part of ourselves—including the wounded, vulnerable child within.

Loving your inner child means recognizing the experiences that shaped you, acknowledging the pain you may have carried for years, and offering yourself the care and compassion you may not have received growing up. When we heal this part of ourselves, we break old patterns, build self-worth, and create a foundation for authentic relationships. It’s not about living in the past—it’s about giving yourself the love now that you always deserved.

One way to nurture your inner child is through self-compassion. Many trauma survivors carry harsh self-judgment, believing they are “too much” or “not enough.” Imagine speaking to yourself the way you would to a young child—offering kindness instead of criticism. When we replace self-judgment with self-love, we start rewriting the inner dialogue that has kept us stuck.

Another way to heal is through play and creativity. Our inner child thrives when we engage in things that bring joy, whether it’s dancing, painting, or simply going outside to feel the sun on our face. Trauma often forces us to grow up too fast, but giving yourself permission to play reconnects you to your true self—the part of you that is still curious, hopeful, and open to new experiences.

Lastly, setting boundaries is a powerful act of self-love. Many survivors struggle with saying no, fearing rejection or abandonment. But protecting your peace is essential for healing. Think of boundaries as a way of telling your inner child, “I will keep you safe.” The more we honor our own needs, the more we reinforce the message that we are worthy of love and respect.

Healing your inner child isn’t about erasing the past—it’s about embracing every part of yourself so you can live more fully in the present. When you give yourself the love, care, and protection you needed all along, you stop seeking external validation and start showing up as your true, authentic self. And that? That’s the greatest gift you could ever give yourself.